Last Exit from Brexit

December 5, 2017

By The Grouse Beater - Scotland

A quick guide to solutions for Scotland to escape England’s fiasco

Living next door to England is living next to a perpetual building site constructed on a PFI budget we paid for, and continue paying for the next twenty years. No matter how many times architects and site foremen say they’ll keep noise and mess to a minimum, that they won’t encroach on our property, you know they’re lying.

Moreover, the scheme means seriously crap buildings emerging to block out sunshine and light, with extensions added not on the approved plans. Finding out councillors are almost all shareholders in the site, it doesn’t assuage anger to know you were voted down over opposing the scheme by the council to whom you pay taxes. We are left feeling powerless, trapped.

We can stand shoulder-to-shoulder with England’s plan- or we can do something about it.

The silence is deafening

The Tory government and it’s wooden headed propaganda agents kicking Scotland’s fetlock are unwilling or unable to explain what will happen to Scotland when they give Johnny Foreigner the heave-ho. They even keep their own regions in the dark. Talk is all platitudes and generalities. Their MPs have all the dynamism of a paper aeroplane.

We’ve seen evidence of the worst to come: long-time respected residents repatriated, a sharp diminution in critical migrant labour, the steady loss of civil rights.



Incidentally, has anybody noticed the Etonian twit who caused all this, David Cameron, is nowhere to be seen? He’d lay claim to some guile and intelligence if he spoke Scottish. He tried that on a day return visit to Edinburgh, gargled something, and left.

Cameron is replaced by a sleazy bunch of vainglorious poseurs. There’s a likelihood the idiots call out their own name when they climax during sex.

On seeing xenophobia unrestrained England’s politicians are filled with woolly emotion. By regaining all the powers previously shared with the EU, Brexit is a gift from Heaven, the perfect device to ignore the Irish, stuff the Welsh, use Gibraltar as an ace negotiating card, and “tame the Nats”, making them peripheral to politics indefinitely.


If you’re wondering who’s in the coffin – it’s Scotland if we don’t control our destiny

Optimists say there’s still time to turn back, pessimists say English racism has elevated greed and hatred to patriotic virtues. Either way, there has to be another referendum for Scotland to decide if it wants to endorse repugnant xenophobia, or create the egalitarian society it feels it seeks by nature.

Be advised: To accept a boss’s demand for sex as part of securing work and a career crushes self-esteem and dignity. You never fully recover.

What can be done?

This list is to archive for reference, or send to friends. It’s expressed in digestible form.

It’s all about Scotland. England can look after its own mess. I try to avoid the technical miasma of Brexit. I began compiling points weeks ago. By coincidence both First Minister Nicola Sturgeon and the EU published their own predictions.

The clowns of Westminster are sinister and deadly. Finding humour in any of this is almost impossible, but I’ll try.

Brexit Disaster for Dummies

Who to Trust

Some unionist Brexiteers and a small group of SNP Brexiteers think leaving the EU will gain a few extra powers for Scotland. Their strategy is to stay passive. You might call it supine, sit and beg, roll over, and pretend to be dead. They think if they are patient and polite devolution will gain powerful adherents. Anybody who thinks Westminster grabbed Brexit in order to enrich Scotland needs sectioned immediately.

Stopping Brexit

The SNP argue all four nations – graciously calling Northern Ireland a nation – should have a veto to reject or accept the outcome of Brexit talks. Dismissed out of hand by the Tories – a veto no one gave them, and a sign they mean to have first dibs on gold they dig up – SNP strength in numbers at Westminster proves worthless. Duplicitous Labour and the discarded placenta called the Liberal Democrats refused to support the idea. What England wants England gets.

A soft Brexit

Some of the electorate are ready to accept staying in the Single Market. Freedom of movement is guaranteed in that event, something Scots value. SNP policy acknowledges cut off from the EU leaves Scotland at the mercy of rapacious England. The world’s best economists, Yanis Varoufakis among them, agree Scotland is more than capable of surviving as a nation state again, guaranteed to prosper if part of the Single Market.

Maybe if a few more Tory MPs could be sacked for improper behaviour, (such as being an MP) we could see some modesty for a cross-party consensus for staying in the Single Market, but Etonian-bred Exceptionalism stops that happening.

Scotland’s corner

Scotland has everything to gain by staying in the Single Market irrespective of what the other nations do. Securing that gives us a status analogous to the European  Economic Area (EEA). In fact, there’s nothing stopping us becoming a member of the EEA. Agriculture and fisheries would be excluded. That solution keeps Aberdeen voters who stuck gap-toothed Tory Suits on us very happy so long as Scotland gains control over both. It also avoids tariffs between Scotland and our dear departing neighbour, border controls too, allowing the free movement of workers between Scotland and Europe, the workers we need, and the opportunities Scots want to pursue.

Scotland gets to participate in Social Provision, exchange research, and EU Justice. We sit at a top table hitherto denied us. So, this solution is devoutly to be wished.

You can hear right-wing rednecks choke on their jellied eels demanding  border controls their side of the red line to stop infiltration of superior educated peoples into England.

We want no brain surgeons here, mate! We can flip our own burgers!”

And where would the phantom ‘No Borders’ campaign be then? Personally, I don’t mind border controls to England. It means jobs. Lots of them. When you think about it we will need some way of keeping out all the clones created by UKip and the BNP. In any event, controls are in place in the Schengen area for third country nationals and it works extremely well.

How easy is easy for EU-EEC membership?

Reading EU advice confirms membership is technically easy to attain. (Cue pasty-faced Brit nationalist with knotted hanky on their bald head screaming “Spain will veto it!”)

The EU says there are challenges being in both the EU Single Market and trading with rUK but they are not insuperable. Lichtenstein – a miniscule independent country minding its own business and keeping British tax evasion safe – is in a customs union with Switzerland but both are effectively in the Single Market by virtue of Switzerland’s treaties with it.

This is where it gets a bit complicated, and I have to check and recheck I understand what the EU argues. The EU puts it succinctly: “In order for Scotland to remain compliant with Single Market regulations, the Scottish Government and Parliament would require new competences across a wide range of Single Market matters currently reserved to Westminster.” I think what that means is a lot of hard negotiation to place Scotland in the best EU category, as well as pleasant discussions on mutual benefits.

There is hope in an open border between rUK and the Republic of Ireland being applicable to Scotland. Nothing is impossible.

As for the expected English redneck backlash aimed at Scottish immigration freedom, control of immigrants can be monitored at the place of work, (a solution agreed by the EU) not a difficult  law to police considering Scotland is a nation of only 5 million, with only a few thousand economic migrants entering each year, and a large number leaving.


Once upon a time the SNP looked upon Europe with suspicion. We were just free of World War II and German imperialism. Thankfully, today Scotland is wiser. We realise the value of remaining a European state. But we lost it when unionists lied about  keeping EU membership sacrosanct if we voted for England’s interests.

The SNP was re-elected with a mandate to hold a second plebiscite if there was a material change in circumstances. Next to every Englishman taking to wearing the kilt, Brexit is an humungous ‘material change in circumstances’.

Naysayers and ‘No’ voters were conned. Westminster has not ruled out a second plebiscite if we behave ourselves and do not create a stushie over Brexit – the classic torturer’s ploy. We might have to wield a chair leg to make our escape back into the wider world. Be prepared.

The Scottish Government has reaffirmed its faith in, and commitment to, a free Europe. And while aspects of the EU undoubtedly require democratisation – a process already in process by the DiEM25 movement in each nation that includes radical change to the way the EU bank operates – there is no basis in EU law that blocks or forbids Scotland from becoming a full EU member.

Threat of vetoes issue from General De Gaulle’s pathological distrust of English influence in Europe. He had a point. De Gaulle thought England a vain nation; it had a navy not to see the world, but to have the world see it.

That aside, no European country has stated it will veto Scotland’s entry. Nada, zilch, zero. Nor is there a queue Scotland would have to join. Europe is just as adept at multi-tasking as any institution.

It all takes time

Yes, regaining membership to the EU will take time, but we could have been there now had only a few thousand No voters the backbone to reinstate self-determination when it was offered in a carefully designed package keeping intact much of our relationship with England in trade and freedom of movement.

We’re faced with a growing number of Scotland’s citizens who want rid of England’s corrupt influence altogether. Separatists we have but we now have absolutists. They know things will get worse. We might have to wear a St George’s Cross on our lapels.

In the short term Scotland can be part of the EEC and EFTA and so benefit immediately as part of the Single Market, while keeping out of the controversial fisheries policy. Like all the other solutions there will be complications to surmount, but it’s either that or becoming the mirror image of England’s stomach-churning movement to the far right. Do you want one of Scotland’s notable achievers on our banknotes or Nigel Farage?

In the meantime we can watch the clueless Tory clowns at Westminster go through the motions of pretending they know what they’re doing, and that they are in possession of all four aces if not their intellectual faculties. They talk but don’t think. Their opinion of their abilities isn’t just high, it’s in bloody orbit.

There are three things destined for jeopardy: a bird in the hands of a child, a young girl in the hands of an old man, and Scotland in the grip of England. You have been warned.

You can follow  Grouse Beater on twitter at @Grouse_Beater       or at the webpage Grouse Beater

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